This is the part where I tell you to “know your limits.” But you’re an adult who makes choices, and I’m not your mom. So here’s the real secret: Pace yourself with water—one glass of water for every adult beverage. Also, eat some cheese before drinking. Fat slows alcohol absorption, giving your liver a fighting chance. You’ll still have fun, but you won’t wake up feeling like you swallowed a hornet’s nest.
Eventually, the nausea will fade. The regret will linger. But you’ll have survived, armed with ginger, cold water, and the knowledge that pink paint can save your life. Go forth and sin responsibly. Or at least, sin strategically.
