A local indie candidate called Dave the Cacti ran on a single policy: every home gets a free succulent. He pitched it as “green infrastructure for your windowsill.”
He won no seats. But a local garden centre reported a 200% spike in cactus sales the next week. Coincidence? We think not.
His slogan? “Vote Cacti, Because They’re Hard to Kill.” Relatable.
Surbiton’s Rebellion
Surbiton is usually quiet. Not in 2026. Residents voted overwhelmingly for a candidate who promised a new roundabout shaped like a giant donut.
“It’s about identity,” said local baker Gemma. “We want people to think: ‘That’s the donut town.’” It didn’t pass. But the petition had 400 signatures.
Also, the donut candidate lost by 14 votes. The recount took three hours. The winner needed a strong coffee.
